I wish I had the chance to say everything that I have to say, to the people I’d like to talk to and to no one when it’s needed.
In this period I have been closing myself in silence again and I just cannot go out of it now. I cannot write, I cannot talk, and everything feels so tight on me right now. It’s like I need it, I know I do! And it’s not happening because I am sad, because deep inside I am very, very serene. It’s happening just because I don’t have the chance to do it the way I actually want and need to.
I am surrounded by good friends, but sometimes I have these periods where I feel alone.
The truth is that I miss that one connection, that was mine like nothing else ever will. If only I had the chance to do something.. at least talking. At least greeting with a smile..
I just wish I weren’t afraid. I know that if I weren’t, everything would be just better. But even if fear goes away, I don’t have the chance to go there, I don’t have an excuse. And I don’t know why it is happening, but I know it’s not to lead me to something bad. Nothing happens for bad reason. And again, that’s what faith is about. I trust Him, and I know He listens to me. If only the time, that time came..